It is impossible. Don’t believe what you’ve been told. The old ways do not work and the new ways are wrong!
From one baby boomer to the millennials, I have so much sympathy for the position you are in. There is no way to make your life feel right as long as you are trying to duplicate your parents vision. A new culture needs to be created. It will be messy, but if you are going to survive, a new game with meaning needs to be created.
College is not working. Starting life with burdening debt because you have been handed the idea that college equals a satisfactory life, is as much a fairytale as The Three Bears. May I suggest maybe shadowing apprenticeships with online tutors. “Doing” will be more functional than the ancient “Answering A, B, or C” question components.
As a divorced female who was married under the “Fred Flintstone mentality of “men rule”, then left with nothing,” l think I have a glimmer of what you’re suffering. The goal to just survive seems elusive. Where can you live that doesn’t cost more than what you make in service jobs? Service jobs are devalued, but service is to humanity and so our humanity is being devalued!
It is very much like the servitude that the miners had working all the time and owing more to the company store than they made. You are imprisoned! There is no time for you, and when there is a hope of seeing light the game shifts and your expertise has evaporated.
Jobs are less and less human oriented and algorithms are replacing jobs. We have lost humanity! We have devalued mothers. (The essential component for the species to survive) in favor of contributing to this “make money” illusion of value. Get rid of that component first! Money is an illusion (proven by all the blockchain currencies out there).
Since my experience (out of order for the time) was a female in computing I have experienced the social media evolution from the beginning. From the first instant communication programs of Kermit to the mess of the competing “Look at me” apps we have today, they are isolating, not socializing and are again just another illusion.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m all for stories. Stories are what give life purpose. All cultural stories are illusions, we simply need to create our own and not buy into those Illusions handed to us by those who benefit from our conversion.
I remember when another Agile project manager set me aside and walked me through the question, “What is important in your life?” We made a list. Then he had me list what I was doing with my time. (The one and only nonnegotiable component of existence.) Was the life I was living in harmony with what I thought important? Boy was that an eye opener!
I had been catering and assisting with other people’s goals and ideas thinking that somewhere along the line I would get recognized. (No one mentors any more.) It’s all about “Me”, and since that target is always moving, having helpers is necessary. The best you can do is #2. There is no way being the number two dog in an organization will get you to your goal. It will be their goal.
I can see the evolution that has taken place and society’s shift down the rabbit hole. I have been written off in the current society, but that’s ok…I have written off society.
I now live in my own world of value. Got a minimum income and live with a $300 mortgage, but that was both a miracle and a multi-year project to create, allowing me to ignore most of the societal illusions.
Millennials get rid of your burn outs; make your lists, and create that society that allows you to thrive. Don’t let them force you into misery.
Sorry I won’t be around to help but you have my best wishes for an impactful journey!
Hugs, Pam